This & That with Myself

Yes, that’s me, muhahaha~

Before I decided to come home, I went through a long period of deep thinking… (around…2 days? hehe) Career wise, I should really come home; spiritual wise, I should stay in San Francisco. Things are going exactly the same as I thought, nothing really surprise me besides I start enjoying this boring, predictable life. But don’t worry, I am pulling myself back to the present and searching for any possible enjoyment around me!

I don’t think it is a good idea to predict what is going to happen with your life, or have someone decides what will happen to your future, but still, when you do predict something and it comes true? This enormous pride under your mind will overwhelme oneself.

So, I am just proud about something goes as my plan, is it good or bad? Nah, I don’t want to know yet.

PS: Congratulation to The Daily Show team won 2 Emmy’s and good job to The Colbert’s folks with 3 nominations!!

I used to think human beings are evolving backwards because dinasors are mean to rule the world; we are getting more cold blooded like a reptile, we are going back to the jungle.

My surrounding is full of unrealistic fantasy, with fake gorgeous buildings and gardens, with walking corpse dress in pink on the street. The image is so nicely presented, but when you touch the image with your finger tip, the people fade away like ashes and the buildings collapse.

So unreal, just like Los Angeles.

Another interview today…

I actually hope this will go well, because my other performing stuffs are getting better now, which make me really happy So, I better put everything together and start my life as a professional! Sounds good right? But the paid is so so…

Now I understand why many people try so hard to stay in the US, because in term of cost of living, it make more sense than Malaysia. Average Malaysian earn around RM2000, for fresh graduate is about RM1500-1800. A bottle of Pantane shampoo is RM15++, a bag of small chips is RM1.50, a laptop is RM2300++, half gallon milk is RM8.90, a chocalate bar is RM2.30, an ipod? Who cares.

Compare to the United States, the same size pantane is US2.89, the same size chips is US0.99, a basic laptop is US 499, half gallon milk is US 2.00, a chocalate bar is US0.79. The averange salary for a fresh grade is US2000-3000.

I am obviously live in hell, If I am going to stay here, I just have to find my own surviving skills, like everybody else- No shopping, no travelling, NO ALCOHOL, no dine-out.

Well, I will just spend my money on TV Cable and hopefully, reunited with my beloved Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. And…Nancy Grace??!! Oh, I mean Anderson Cooper

Well, I turn down the job because it is too weird. I would rather selling mooncake then being tighted up by a full time job. But the company really wanted me to work there and they wanted to neogociate the schedle, paid, and stuff…

Now they make me feel like a bad person.

For the first time in my life I am so confuse about what I want until I feel like to get marry! Yeah right, attend some speed dating events and find some deparate guys then make it work

See, women don’t just get marry for love or money, we can get marry when we are confuse, even though, that doesn’t sounds like a good solution at all, but is not impossible.

Who knows you might just bump into someone right. Ahgrrrr…

So, I just apply for this job because I was not doing anything at home and went for the interview at the same day. Then I was hired on the spot.

This was one of the most ridiculous moment in my life. Of course, as all the possible candidates, I was promoting myself at the beginning, but when I realized this guy was going to hire me just like that, I started panic. That was so unusual; it didn’t follow the regular interview procedure at all. There were a candidates before me, and according to the manager, he had interviewed a few other candidates. I even told him, "You can’t just hire me like this, I thought you suppose to compare me with others and…." I was speechless.

Then I started to wonder, maybe there wasn’t a regular procedure for such thing, maybe it only exist in the US. And I found myself in a rather embarass position because I am jobless, and I was rejecting the job on the day that I applied, interviewed and hired. And this guy sitting in front of me looked really confuse by my behavior.

I have a night to think about it, no comparison yet because this is the first job I applied, tough decision here….

I have never realize in my life that Malaysia have not many sunny days at all. It is hot of course, but is always cloudy for some reasons. Maybe because is close to the rainny season, or maybe is because of all the bad news, undone construction, broken hearts, and boring life?

My friend visited me yesterday and shared her so call "working life" with me, I listend to her carefully and my mind was just absolutely terrified. Am I going to be like this afterall? Is this the "adult life" waiting ahead of me? Is there anyway I can stop it??

Yes, there is probably a way out- go back to school. My dad is keeping the pressure high about pursuing my master degree, which according to him I should have done long ago. I was showing him my hatred to GRE and i would love to persue my master degree 1 year later. And my lovely dad was like, "But you are too old for that by then!" Funny, my dad is worrying about his youngest daughter getting old.

I kept wondering later, is there really a schedule for life? Can a person really too old for something? Like drinking? Started with beer then fancy cocktail then scotch and wine?

So, where’s my schedule of life? I am already drinking scotch…

There’s this politician on the newspaper claimed that the crime rate in my country ONLY went up 11% compare to last year.

So…apparently 11% is not too much of a deal for our government. There were approximately A COUPLE more people in my country being robbed, raped, killed this year.

This is exactly like what the Fox News Reporter said, " There were only these many people died in Iraq, think about Civil War!"

There are things that you just don’t compare and you just don’t say ONLY, if you are a human.

Sometimes when a man kiss you, it is just because you are a woman, not because of who you are.

So do women.

I got a new hair cut yesterday just to suit the weather here. I remember when I was young I always wanted to have long hair and my parents will strongly oppose with this "long hair" idea. However, I finally made it to have long long hair for a while until my school banned all the students to have long hair.

Now I have all the right to keep my hair long, but to be practical and stylist, I decided to keep it short. I really like retro hair cut, fashion, music, purse…hehehe. I am not sure when does this idea start getting into me, but I just enjoy it. So this hair cut will definately fit most of my outfit.

Anyway, I finally have something to work on, I hope this will be the end of my boring life in the second biggest city of Malaysia!

Things just weren’t very smooth ever since I came back from BKK.

First my cold hasn’t gone away for 3 weeks, ai ai ai, a little sick of my sexy voice, haha…

And the job, yeah, the job. It didn’t come out as the way that I was expected, I thought everything will happen quickly, but I have been waiting for a few days, just to be in touch with my friend. I hate to wait, as usual, hate wasting my time. And for one of my very best friend? This is so annoying.

So I guess I should seriously look for a job now, or change my ticket? Hmm…life is such an adventure, everything is so uncertain. But I am bored as hell, I should start exploring….what? Oh, I can’t really do it because someone just got killed near my house by robbers.

I still can’t drive on a right hand side because my dad is making up excuses not to let me use the car, grrr…but he is my dad, I can’t really yell at him ya? And of course I won’t cause I love him, so nothing much I can do.

Now I live like a fish in a fish bowl, the only different is, things aren’t seem like exciting at all outside the bowl…