I think, I live too much into my own life and forget about…
there are people suffering,
accidents,
disasters,
illness,
separation,
death,
and …..
Some of them are so close to me I didn’t even realize, some of them are too far a way but I should have known.
Life prove once again, unpreditable is just as ordinary as living a life.
And I am found guilty, because I forgot.
I think…
I always believe coworkers can be your friends as well, because that happened to me before. I would say my coworkers in SF definately are my best friends forever!
But this is not always the case, just like not everybody can be your friends, so, it is not about coworkers. I do feel more enjoyable and have more topics to talk about when I hang out with my coworker, we understand each other and can help each other relieve stress.
I have changed to a very straight forward person long ago (hell ya, I was the typical twisted around kind of talker before) and I am so surprise I can’t stand when my friends can’t be straigth forward when talking to me and that actually make me mad.
And I wonder…
1) Why people don’t read whatever it is that appear on the screen?
2) Why do people enjoy so much reading "between the line"?
3) Why do people assume when the best way to find out the answer is asking me?
4) Why do people don’t read but prefer listening when the thing is so important and you should make it black and white?
5) Why do people like to guess my emotion? My age?
6) Why do these kind of people always appear in your work area?
Maybe is a culture thing…..what a good excuse!
So my buddy is visiting me next week from NYC and we gonna do the SDDC thing again…
So what is SDDC? SDDC= San Diego Damn Cool. All my best, sweetest, awesome memories lied in the southern coast line, San Diego definately is my favorite place of all time!
I went to SD 3 times, 2 winter breaks during school and a shopping trip a month ago. I just have this very click feeling with San Diego, you don’t find the best beach or the best food there, but I guess each time I was there, I was there with the right people at the right time.
Point loma, tidal wave, Lo Jolla, Coronado, pacific beach, ocean beach, imperial beach, mission bay, black beach (the spoooooky one), ocean side, old town, seaport village….oh yeah, the Catherina crossing with Catherina thing. It is good to know a place so well and yet never make this place your home.
I will be lying on on the same beach, staying at the same ocean front motel and remembering all my same old dreams…
I know I am falling into a slight depression…
It can easily be showed from my eating habit and…. adjusted my pant in the public (yes, is ugly I know, but it is better for it falling down in public…)
I used to have great creation when I am in muddy mood, but somehow not much creative thinking come out of that. I guess, I am in a too comfortable environment to actually feel something.
I miss the first day I arrived San Francisco, I had no friends, no job, not much money, lived in the worst neighborhood, slept on the hard rock bunk bed with an unknown man below me, and it was a rainy plus windy day. I walked 10 blocks that day to use the free internet with my heavy laptop. I walked pass so many homeless and drug addicts that evening. I saw them dancing with their own rythm, when their pace stop, they injected themselve, and continue to dance, again.
Then I found out, the library already close.
That’s the only time in my life I feel so alive.
It had been 3 cloudy days and I finally see the lovely sun again! My summer clothes seriously can’t wait to get out of my closet!
There’s nothing really special since I came back from Lawrence, just talking to my lawyer everyday. Not much work for now cause everything have to be stopped until the lawsuit is over.
The more I work with lawyer, the more I am glad I don’t have to be one of them. I had all these meetings with them down at the beautiful Newport Beach quite often, and is always 1 me vs 4 of them. Seriously, they talked way too much and sometimes that make me day dreaming. It is interesting to have 4 lawyers talking to you at the same time. They all have something to say, and that something is too much info. Their brian can’t catch up with their mouth and it creates a really funny scence for me.
I will never want to talk like that, I would like to be able to say "yes" instead of "I believe so", I would like to say "no" instead of "I need to double check it". Lawyers are great people, they help you think of all those uncertainties, and all you have to tell them is "yes" or "no".
And that Yes or No cost you so much, just because, we don’t want to deal with all those uncertainties.
Finally my probation is officially over after 4 months!I have been working way too much for the past 2 months, well I am happy with the raise and stuffs. But what make me more exciting is my first official weekend by myself in LA! (no boss around! haha)
That totally make my day and I am glad I have found my first drinking buddy in LA. Yaay! It is a good start and more should come after that. (Yes, you never complain you have too many drinking buddies, the more the better!) But looks like it is very different here from San Francisco, in term of the happy hours thing…I haven’t quite figure out if there’s any interesting bar and good drink around my town yet, but I am sure I will find some if I keep looking and keep driving.
Of course, while I am looking for some fun places to go, I better be my own bar tender first to cope with such a heavy work load. Yes, and more exercise…
I am hoping for a phonecall free weekend.
